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Dead Men Don't Bite Back

by Jared Morris and The Nice Price

/
1.
Today a drop of semen, tomorrow a pile of Ash I sound like I look, like I'm about to crash My hands are made of briar my heart is broken glass Lets get down to business; I'm in it for the cash The world is full of hazzards, the drains are full of clogs I here to discuss your hygenine not hear your monologues The pigs are in the meadow pretending to be frogs The devil's in the ghetto slow dancing with the fog Everybody hates the shit I do Rip thinks the worms are too good for you Eating broth made from a thorn bush, bread made from cement This is what we get for being arrogant There's monsters in the hallway, but we're invisible to them I was impressed the prison mess was so decadent Everything I make is a waste of energy Don't get caught up in my wake, its an emergency I'm trying to relate, but I'm doing it poorly You're more foreign to me now then you ever meant to be Everybody hates the shit I do Rip thinks the worms are too good for you you you I dared a generation to rob me of my soul I'm not sure I have one, but man I'm on a roll I've said ten thousand words that will someday take a toll How could I know the future would be so emotional? I never had instructions on how this should go Amidst all this destruction, you'd think by now I'd know Some day you'll find these songs and say "another one of those That spent his life composing and all his time alone" Everybody hates the shit I do Rip says the worms are too good for you Maybe I'm not well adapted Success depends upon being well crafted If it were up to me I'd never leave my room
2.
Escape Hatch 03:30
Escape hatch Where did it all go wrong It's a disaster The paint is peeling off the walls Down to bare plaster Do you hear the jungle drums Warn of an attacker? They confuse your senses dull Your pulse is racing faster I can't get the escape hatch open Be careful which way it swings I'm not certain but I'm hoping Beware the doll that sings Where did it all go wrong? The woods are becoming soundless We're jumping in dry leaves While mute panic surrounds us Where did it all go wrong? I thought we'd planned it better She wanted to stay out night But her parents wouldn't let her I can't get the escape hatch open Be careful which way it swings The deck is soaked, the latch is broken The gates of hell are string When did it all go wrong? You were fucking a cheerleader Because she'd cheer you on No matter how you'd treat her When did it all go south? This storm is a disaster Stop here and hear me out I thought I could out last her I can't get the escape hatch open I took a pill for block the sun I took another and now i'm hoping To forget that you're the one I can't get the escape hatch open All other options are closed I can't get the escape hatch open We weren't safe, we weren't even close.
3.
You said just be yourself I don’t like myself that much You said love yourself first I think that that's enough And after all we've done this is all we get I was looking for some action I am my own assassin And the shit I used to like Don't seem worth my time I see myself in you I think that we should screw You're in The Big Bubble In school they called you trouble Outside it's just rubble I've mastered being subtle Stand in line and be on time I was looking of the sun And that's when time just stopped That's when the plot thickened But I just felt sickened I can't get a job here. They all talked to each other I'll have to change my name Just to get an offer There's pictures of her I Some clear and some are hazy You said you were an optimist I said that your just lazy I want to leave the place I live Do you need a reason? I try to do it right I guilty of high treason Stand in line and be on time You said keep up the fight The devil's getting dressed He looks a lot like me But I'm not impressed You've been gone so long I’m almost used to it I don’t know whats true these days I talk so much shit I’ve been playing so long I have arthritis in my fingers I’m not great on guitar she said Nor are you a good singer I’m gonna set my car on fire To get some heat to linger I'll swing on a chandelier And mimic The Snakefinger Stand in line and be on time Because its in my nature Nature’s got me in a trance She left me her number Saying thanks for the romance When I leave I'll leave a note Don't open it until December Maybe then it will make sense By then you may remember She held on to my hand When I took my last breath She rolled her eyes and sighed and said Can’t we get on with this If you see me on the road Pretend it isn't me I'll do the same for you Like it was meant to be Stand in line and be on time I'll keep working I'll keep working I'll keep working I'll keep working
4.
An ocean made of plastic It’s fantastic Elastic Body lotion Drastic Coca Cola Classic What’s the commotion? Whip it out, a devotion To a souvenir Sphinx, It’s not what you think That’s how it goes The Colossus of Rhodes Why are the pyramids Made of Emma stone? So alone Tossed around by primitives Traction unlimited Insignificant Don’t pretend In a decade we’ll be them What fun Making bricks out of mud In the back yard fly a grass hut to Mars I used to be nice I used to shoot dice I used to watch Spice Between blurry lines "Don’t let your dick run your life" That’s Mr. Rhythm's good advice I’ll never win a Moon Man You know the end is too soon, man Eating jelly with a spoon, man And here I change my tune, man Knee deep in brackish water From the first time I saw her I could tell she was our daighter The cops finally caught her Tryin' to steal a flying saucer I tried to fix her headphone jack But I couldn’t find the solder I used to be inside her A Large Hadron Collider Diet pop or cherry cider Bright and getting brighter You just want to fuck her But I’m a super conductor She said "I suck But I’m no sucker" Life in Vineland Garbage islands As big as Texas, it doesn’t vex us, solar plexus Don’t correct us Artificial fishes granting wishes Eat a Rubber Ring, it’s so delicious Dirty dishes, Sid vicious, the fictitious Member of the Sex Pistols Dr Jones, can i get a witness Blister pack, Jack Rabbit, Magic Jack Giving all the mermaids a thrill Water pistols, shoot to kill Easter toys made in China Winding up on Easter Island. Oh Poseidon Whats my sign man? You look good in that polyester Tits like Carol Hester's Spanish boots of imitation leather A West Marine ocean tether Under the weather A real treasure Let’s keep it together But I never met her It'd be her pleasure Red sky at night Sailor’s delight Make it lewd We both eat seafood Not a lot Marianas Trench, full of pop tops, crop tops, Straws and cyclops psi-ops Sneaky strong corporate cops It’s glorious Shiva is furious You're ignoring us Who is victorious? Could it be that there’s more of us. Soda jerkers, bottom lurkers, phony burkas Our legacy sexting the police In an emergency Toss your phone into the sea Turn on its GPS That’s how we’ll reconnect Self contained under water breathing apparatus Strapped to a cactus And hung on the lattice What’s your marital status? Meet me at lake Tell me what’s at stake? This is our life electric Lost in the wake Living with you was a piece of cake Protect i or wreck it. Intersect it or reject it No belief in magic Everyone is bored. The only one that’s real here is Traci Lords The last time I saw you You said your were done with all the voodoo Praise be the Ancients of Mu Mu With your guru, planning what to do But for me, I’m with Vishnu Im with the avatars of Krishna Hare Rama but I still miss you In all the trauma That we’ve been through The bottle’s empty It doesn’t tempt me I'm your ghost But who sent me I can’t repay what you lent me Resent me I’ve got plenty Tia Dalma And the late Brian DePalma Spoke at my alma mater We got lost in the Bahamas I voted for Barack Obama And I'm sick of all the drama No quarter For what I didn’t order Hoarders cross the boarders Make way for the reporters Looking for supporters That was when I could ignore her New jersey Don’t worry I can’t see It's getting blurry This motel smells like curry Time to go now We better hurry Manic Preachers in the bleachers No one’s teachers Double features and new sneakers I used the wrong wire and I blew out the speakers Pleasure seekers and secret leakers of New Wave Hookers Pressure cookers Crooked onlookers Cookin' the Bookers You had your own but then you took hers Could it bewhat shook her? Poor old Jimbo Dead and gone Buried with his boots still on Found him in a French church lawn Mojo risin' with the dawn Why save it, we can throw it away Its okay I heard you say You're gonna be next Sasha Grey Or Dorian Gray In DeLorean grey Tattle O’Day We had a band and we wanted to play No pay. One Way Lay Lady Lay Time For Noisy USA Hitachi, you know every make Hibachi, you came to eat steak You said that its gonna be great Put on the breaks It's not 1998 I am awake Car hops in skates Know my name for goodness sakes I do what it takes Easy as cakes I can spot all these fakes Save your grief, I'm a common thief Save me a seat on the Great Barrier Reef Don’t eat meat, it’s okay if you cheat You're past your prime but is that a crime? If there's time I can stop on a dime That’s about all I can afford All this other noise can be ignored Don’t act like you don’t know the score Artificial platelets Everybody fakes it Everyone is bored The only one that’s real here Is Traci Lords
5.
6.
Middle Age 04:18
I heard that it can be argued That you are the living proof Work hard and sacrifice too You will be rewarded Maybe for some this is true But it didn't work for me for you When everything we make or to do Is gone or distorted. Now nobody sees U.F.O.s And there's nowhere new for us to go And even if we wanted too though We couldn't afford it Your heroes have killed themselves yes On purpose or by accident Now the only ones that we have left Are no longer touring Oh middle age Oh middle age Its the silver anniversary But feels like it was yesterday In that time we've not had much to say This is our life our life at 40 There's nothing new under the sun The killer is still on the run You're not even sure how to get shit done Help me, Mr. Gordy. Do machines know how to think? What would they think of your kinks? And what you do when you're all alone Would they support it? You know its true so cop to it But you don't know when to quit Floating in space like the Voyager 6 Un-escorted Oh middle age Oh middle age The jokers are wild and suicidal There are no hall passes here just crocodiles No Popsicles Obstacles Ways to the hospital Take a big bite out and smile Bobby Eaton the great, is late for a date On Jupiter Station and I can relate. I don't know what they mean by a zero sum game But you win when I lose again and again I've had enough and I'm calling your bluff With the god of gods oh Supreme Krishna We chant your names a holy mantra Hare Hare We parked outside of Morrissey's house With no intention of getting out Or ringing the bell or starting to shout I don't think he saw me I've had my share of water and gin With Miracle Mike the Headless Chicken Before we reach mars in the end Repeat back my safe word again I keep missing my favorite bands live You don't even tell me they're gonna arrive But man it looked like a good time Philly;s not really that far of a drive Oh middle age Oh middle age I'll meet you at the Hoover Dam You'll know it's me by what I have planned. At least I'll have somewhere to land. Make way boys I'm here watching for ghosts again But no matter how high I am When I close my eyes and count to ten I never meet them So, ready or not here I come I have wishes, 1001 But none of them sound like much fun So its your choice I never managed to have any kids Where I sit, the couch smells like cat piss It's true it's as good as it gets Hallelujah The jokers are wild and suicidal There are no hall passes here just crocodiles No Popsicles Obstacles Ways to the hospital Take a big bite out and smile Friday the 13th won't show me no mercy There's nothing left of me here Mr. Deputy The safe is empty it just sits there tempting me Lock me inside and swallow the key
7.
Oh Hey 02:34
Can you feel time pushing, pushing back on you? It's natural to do What do you think would happen if came with him Did you think you'd be on top forever Sonny Jim? Brace yourself for the coming storm Sit close we'll both stay warm and If I prepare it makes it real And then I'd prefer it surprise me still c'est vieux Oh, hey Haven't I seen you before Let's sneak outside of the back door and we can leave together Oh, hey I'm stranded at Base Camp on Everest How'd I get myself into this? Trouble's on the horizon like we feared Chaos is rising in the atmosphere That much is clear When I see you it's actuallement déja vu And then the air leaves the room And then just like that you don't give a damn Everyone make way For the big flim flam Just like we planned Oh, hey Haven't I seen you before I gave you a lift to The Barn Door I've known you forever Oh, hey Oh, hey Haven't I seen you before let's sneak out of the back door and we can be together Oh, hey. Oh, hey You seemed so susprised to hear my voice It's been so long, you didn't have a choice I lost you forever Oh, hey
8.
Valediction 03:26
Let me tell you what I like Luna Blue and Michael Stipe The moon is high and So am I If you weren't so uptight You could spend the night We're leaving late And the road is rough I wish my love for you would've been enough It's different now That Joe is gone He had a pretty girl from Vietnam I tried to go out and Get one of my own But every time I came Her boyfriend came home The last time you wrote you didn't sign it love You signed "I wish my love for you would've been enough" I wish my love for you would've been enough I've been told that I'm no good Been think of movin' Maybe I should In California They're growing grapes The only thing growing Here is more mistakes It's reach for God or to hell with it all I wish my love would've been enough, that's all We drown is spirits And are scared of men Shaking hands with the newly dead I want to go back and try again "If you mess with time, it messes back," you said When things got tough you really called my bluff I wish my love for you would've been enough I wish my love for you would've been enough
9.
I loved sweet Sara Jane But when I met here she didn’t use her real name I don't know her but I remember her face I wonder if she ever thinks of this place I worked in a fish bowl just for a day I didn't know I'd have to work with snakes I jumped the tanks and swim with the rays That's how Steve Irwin died on videotape That's how it sometimes goes Life is a magic show Going too fast or either too slow That's how it always is Life is just taking a piss No reward but so much risk I love Shirley McClain Some Came Running and some stayed the same She played a dancer and she played a trick The way she died in that made me sick Life's just a lava flow Disrupting a fashion show Deciding too late it's time to go Life is a tidal wave you With nobody left to save At least you can say that you were brave Although we had to go Before the stars explode It was better that way you know The cracks barely show So, I'll see you there at last Man we had a blast It was a hell of a black mass If anyone asks I love being out on a limb On a Jungle Jim or on Vicodin Here comes Father Russell and he lookin' quite grim You right I kind of look like him Life is a grinding halt A full frontal full on assault Its easy to pretend it's not your fault Life is just an avalanche Alone and without your pants This is what we call romance
10.
I wanna thank my maker For nothing A shitty Baker You seemed embarrassed to know me You should be I wonder every day if I made a mistake Leaving my last job That’s a long time to do anything I never let it define me Which was fine by me But now I feel stuck in the country Off the map Everyone’s moving all over the world Going from LA to LV to LDS to LSD And look at me Sleeping on the floor And nothing more I remind myself I didn’t have Any time or money When I worked there either I’ve had the same PA for twenty years My amp shorted out when I tried to fix it I can’t afford to buy new equipment Same drums Same three guitars I look up at the same stars From the same lame bar I started taking these pills To replace the other better pills I don’t like how either of them made me feel Nothing’s real Too many coincidences When I think of it I’m sick of it I’m not as angry as I was Maybe I should be I did the fucking right thing That’s how she put it too The fucking right thing Ok sounds good What now? I can’t even imagine an audience for my shit That guy said we were ahead of our time And split His cousin hanged himself And yet our time has not come Look at what we’ve done It’s out of time If I’d realized in my twenties I was as messed up as I am What would I have done differently? Now I feel guilty just reading Breathing not leaving Believing that I still have time I imagine myself in ten years And I can’t see myself anywhere Except sleeping in the streets In a warehouse under sheets No heat And although I see it coming I don’t know how to stop it Over the hillside Just out of sight If this reads as my manifesto Presto, get it off your chest Oh if you’re not so impressed just go Make up the rest for yourself If you’ve made it this far Hi hello Maybe someday sons of bitches will pay Maybe someday sons of bitches will pay

about

Most of the songs on "Dead Men Don't Bite Back" were intended for the scrapped Jared Morris album "Mr. Rhythm's Good Advice." Originally recorded in late 2018. Unhappy with the final mixes of the prior album, Jared hired an outside producer to remix and track the album in November of 2018, hoping for a March 2019 release. However as months passed and Jared had not received any mixes from the producer, Jared began to feel less and less enthusiastic about the project.

In the meantime, he continued working on new songs with My Version of It, he finished recording the Doctor Goose album "Good for the Gander" and wrote and recorded 22 songs for Shit Kittens for their debut album (due 2020)

After producing the heavier focused Doctor Goose album and Shit KIttens demos, Jared decided to take another look at the yet unfinished Mr Rhythm's Good Advice album. He had been pondering re-recording the drums for the album and started with a few demos. Liking the results, he began rewriting some of the songs and officially scrapped Mr. Rhythm's album in August in favor of the new approach to the songs.

Though the album has been largely rerecorded, there are still a few tracks that were saved. The vocals and keyboards in the song "Traci Lords" (now retitled "Mr. Rhythm's Good Advice") and the keyboards for "You're Cool Now" were taken from the original album.

LIkewise, "Oh Hey" though changed from Am to A major and sped up, the song's original lyrics are mainly unaltered and the song preserved part of a sample from the original version. This appears near the end of the track.

"Don't Open 'Til Leap Day" is a complete rewrite of the song "Coastal Highway" with shortened lyrics and a new chorus.

"Middle Age" started life as a drumless dirge in 3/4 time. Here, The Nice Price switched it to 4/4 timing and took it from the original key or Em to it's relative G major. The lyrics are mostly the same as the original, but the song is completely re-recorded. This song saw the most radical rewrites besides "Leap Day" and took 5 demos to get it right.

"Valediction" is played at the same tempo and same key as the original and the lyrics are mostly the same. The original song contained a prominent keyboard part and a 1999 era Prince inspired drum track. Both were removed. The song is heavier than it's predecessor and is the only song on the album to feature an acoustic guitar.

"Everybody Hates The Shit I Do" and "Escape Hatch" are new songs written after the original album version was completed.

credits

released October 10, 2019

Recorded in Georgetown DE 7/15/19 - 9/15/19
All songs written by Jared Morris and The Nice Price

Mixed and Mastered by Jared and the Nice Price in September 2019.
Artwork painted by Sexfinger

Remixed and Remastered March 2020

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10x Records New Castle, Delaware

10x Records releases collections from the MVOEntertainment Group roster of artists.

Current Artists Roster

My Version of It (rock/punk)

Jared Morris and the Nice Price (alt/rock)

Year of the Comet (space rock)

Dollar Movies (post-punk)

Vinelanders (folk rock)

New Castles (post hardcore)

Doctor Goose (metal)

Shit Kittens (punk)

WMC Fishclub (Avant Garde)
... more

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